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Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Trade Offs

I got an email from Les today with pictures of her last birthday party. It was really nice seeing such familiar sights – old friends, old hangouts, old pastimes. Living here for the past 6 years has not spared me the occasional bouts of homesickness every once in a while. Seeing these pictures was one such time where I missed being back home.

One of my dad’s favorite sayings is “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”. And it’s true. I chose to come to the States to get a better education and to further my career. I chose to settle here with my hubby to provide a safer and better life for our future kids. I chose to live in the States because it is still the land of opportunity and a place where hard work is rewarded. I chose to make this place my home because life here is exciting and new and thrilling. And living here has given me so much – new friends, new opportunities, and learning new things about myself. Living here has made me a stronger, wiser and more independent person. Living here has made me more adventurous, more courageous, and more self-confident too.

But there are trade-offs. I’ve had to give up things dear and familiar. I’ve had to give up the security of my old job – where I was challenged but successful, given support and surrounded by friends, and actually had a life outside the office. I’ve had to give up being with friends I had grown up with, went to high school and college with, and shared my life with. I’ve had to give up living within the comforts of the home I had grown up in. Living without our helpers and a driver who made life much, much easier. I’ve had to give up being surrounded by my family and sharing their lives with them. I've had to give up being part of a community where my life was secure and comfortable. Special occasions like birthdays, weddings, baby showers, graduations and holidays are shared thru pictures, emails and over the phone.

I guess as with all things in life, as we move on, there are things we gain and things we give up. All we can do is carefully look at our options, weigh the pros and cons, say a prayer, and make a decision. There will always be a good side and a bad side to every choice we make. Life is full of these trade-offs. I guess it’s what makes life stimulating, challenging and worth living.


leslie Ty said...

AMEN !!! :)

The feeling is so mutual....when i see pictures of your life in the US...i can't help but wonder...what if i give up my life and career here and try to be independent abroad...what if i move to the US or Canada where i can visit new and exciting places...we always the grass really greener on the other side?

I guess we just have to count our blessings and be happy with what we have...but most of the time...we're only human :)

I really miss having you around...i miss visitng your house...calling you at home...trying out new resturants...hanging out...

But i know you're happy there with jojo :) so i just bear with the trade offs of not having you around...i make it a point to communicate as often (thanks to you blog! ) and to visit you whenever i can :)

jol said...

There is no perfect happiness in our world. As you say, life is full of trade offs--you give up something to get another. It is a good preparation for our meeting with our Creator.

Junarakasa said...

Absolutely true!

I miss hanging out with you too Les and the rest of the gang. Am hoping you guys come back for a visit soon or that I'll be home for a visit myself :)