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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

It's All About Work

It’s been more than two weeks since I last posted anything. Mainly it’s because I have not done anything really worth posting about. Lately, it’s just been work, work, and even more work! I’ve been putting in about 10-12 hours at the office, taking home work at night, and even spending part of my weekends finishing up projects. I’m usually exhausted by the time we turn in for the night – but even then, sleep eludes me since my mind is racing with thoughts of deadlines and meetings and things that still need to get done. What’s worse is after I finally doze off, I wake up in the middle of the night for no apparent reason and start thinking of unfinished projects and go through the “super-tired-but-can’t-fall-asleep” routine all over again. Of course by the time the alarm goes off at 7 AM, that’s when I’m in deep sleep and find it almost impossible to get out off bed.

I know this workload is unhealthy (not to mention the hastily prepared meals bordering on junkfood that we’ve been eating). Plus the stress and pressure can’t be good for me. I’ve been trying to wean off this schedule but somehow it’s not as easy as it sounds. My dad keeps telling me to do my best but to set boundaries – meaning leave work at a reasonable time and not to bring work home. I’ve tried that. It’s just that I seem to be getting more and more behind on my deadlines. That in itself is bad enough but sometimes there are people and projects that depend on me getting my work done on time. It’s not so much that I’m super important and indispensable at work – but rather my job is a huge part of a puzzle. Which means if I don’t finish my part then there’s a huge and distinct gaping hole and the puzzle is incomplete.

Last week I got a mid-year bonus but I also lost my assistant. She was transferred to work on another project (since we lost one of our teammates there). It’s ironic how we get paid more but the work increases exponentially too. So now, I’m working double time making sure my work is done but also covering for my assistant and the projects she left uncompleted. I’m not complaining … well, okay, maybe a little … but rather I’m voicing my frustrations. I can’t really blame anyone for this … the company is growing and heading in a different direction and everyone is just having to perform at a much higher standard and at a faster pace. It’s just the way it is.

Instead of dwelling on the downside, I’m trying to focus on the things that I’m looking forward to most. Things like the coming 3-day Memorial Day weekend, my parents’ trip here, our week-long vacation in Seattle this November, having my sisters and cousins spend the holidays with us this year, and getting our papers hopefully by the first quarter of 2008. Until these good things come about, I’m just going to have to keep going one day at a time.


jol said...

There is no such thing as a perfect job. Everyone I know complains about his job (can be either boring or exhausting or far from home or low pay or playing favorites or bureaucracy or politics or unholy work hours, etc). Blessed is he who enjoys his job and can overlook everything else.

jeff said...

i agree with above. wherever you go or whatever you do, there will always be something wrong or something that will make you feel down. at the end of the day, the most important thing is how you deal with the setbacks and the challenges in life.

i think this has been one of the most important realizations for me.