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Friday, January 08, 2010

It Is What It Is

I was reading a blog yesterday that got me thinking. The blog belongs to a young woman chronicling her first pregnancy. In her entry she wrote about how she would one day answer her child’s question about “who she really was” and “what kind of life she lived”. She wrote about things in her life she was proud of and the things in her life she was not too proud of doing. Her narration was amusing as she came to the conclusion that her life was rather boring … and that despite her fear of shocking her child with tales of her sordid past, she was closer to boring him to sleep.

I could totally relate! If asked by my future child if I had a wild and exciting life … I would have to say “no”. There are lots of words that can describe me and my lifestyle. Words like “happy”, “fulfilled”, “organized” are some that come to mind. But words like “wild”, “thrilling”, “spontaneous”, well, they don’t really seem accurate!

My childhood and teen-age years were normal. I have a great family, good friends, a stable home life. Everything was pretty normal compared to other people I knew. Till I was 26, I lived at home and I had a curfew. No going out on weeknights and home by midnight on weekends. I was constantly teased for that - but looking back, it was not really a very big deal. I had my share of “parental run-ins”. My share of bad grades, of sneaking off with friends, and my share of being grounded and of teenage sulking. But nothing major (at least none that I can remember). And most of it, I think I outgrew.

In general, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, and I don’t gamble. I have never had a one night stand. I never kissed a girl. I have never done drugs. I have never danced on a ledge at some club. I have only seriously dated two guys in my entire life (and one of them is my husband). I lived near San Francisco and now in Los Angeles but can not name a single hip nightclub or bar in either place. I can recommend a lot of great restaurants though. I’ve been to Las Vegas at least once a year in the last 7 years, but never to hit the casinos or to go clubbing but rather to watch Broadway musicals or to try out the buffets. I have never gotten a ticket (except that one time 8 years ago when I did not see a stop sign). I have never shoplifted. Never gotten arrested. I have never gotten expelled or suspended from school. And I have never ever been laid off from a job.

I enjoy spending time with my family. When I was in high school, a lot of my friends called us the “Brady Bunch” and thought it was strange that I enjoyed hanging out with my parents and siblings rather than be out with friends. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think I’m an introverted wallflower. I do enjoy being with people. I like having conversations. I like socializing. In fact my professional choices have been pretty much all about being out there and meeting people. But if asked what my perfect evening would be, it would not be going to some wild party, but rather entertaining good friends in our home.

My husband and I did not have a wild and whirlwind courtship. We were friends first then we dated for 5 years before we got engaged. We planned our wedding for a year before settling down. I am lucky since he shares my interests and agrees that a perfect night out means dinner and catching a movie or watching a play. When we travel, we both like to plan our trips down to the last detail. We don't go skydiving, bungee jumping or mountain climbing. Instead we take city tours in the comfort of a double-decked bus and we visit places recommended by reliable sources. We both enjoystaying in and catching reruns of crime dramas and sitcoms. And we both like hanging out with each others’ families.

I go to Church every Sunday. I volunteer at a soup kitchen / homeless shelter. I call my mom and sister every few days just to check in. I see my in-laws every weekend. I am doing my best to be a good housewife. But, hey, I am not perfect … I do have a temper and am not afraid to use it! I can be pretty stubborn (as my loved ones can attest). I can be controlling and obsessive. I can be quite makulit too. And I have done my fair share of things I am not proud of … for example I have bought pirated DVDs in Metrowalk when I vacationed in Manila. I have super-sized my French fries when I am suppose to be on a diet. I have taken sick days off from work when I was not really sick. I have neglected to do housework just because I am lazy. And I have many times made up some excuse (in other words “lied”) to get out of having to attend social get-togethers! Yes, I am guilty. But those are hardly what I would call "wild".

So, that’s my life in a nutshell. I guess to some mine would seem like a boring life. But it is what it is. I am what I am. I don’t think it’s boring … but rather it’s what makes me happy. And I guess that’s what ultimately matters in the end. The good thing is I don’t have to edit any of my answers when my future child asks me “what kind of life I have” … I can just tell it as it is!


mom said...

I am a lucky mother to have 5 sensible and level headed children who never gave me any problems with school, and were generally very well behaved from their earliest years to the present. I am so very proud of all of you and so thankful to have been blessed with all 5 of you.

leslie ty said...

don't worry have tons of great stories to share with your future may not be "wild" stories...but i'm sure it will be super funny =)

Auntie Lillian said...

I won't call your life boring , Joanne. You have been blessed with a great family and good friends that help mold who you are - pleasant, and contented with what life has to offer. Contentment in itself is a virtue.

Jogs said...

I have never danced on a ledge at some club. - On behalf of all the ledges in the world.....THANKS!!!:)